If you’ve ever tried to teach a lesson while a student is spiraling over a broken crayon, a missing pencil, or that looksomeone gave them across the room — congratulations. You already understand why teaching emotional regulation in the classroom matters.  I have been building a RULER lesson for every grade level (coming soon) since there has never been a greater need in schools.

Because here’s the truth:
👉 Students can’t learn if they can’t regulate their emotions.

And yet, emotional regulation skills are often treated as “extra” or “only for SEL time,” instead of what they really are — a core part of effective classroom management and student success.What Is Emotional Regulation (and Why Teachers Need to Teach It)

Emotional regulation is a student’s ability to:

• Recognize their emotions

• Understand what they’re feeling

• Express emotions appropriately

• Use strategies to calm themselves and problem-solve

In other words, it’s the foundation for:

• Focus and attention

• Positive classroom behavior

• Peer relationships

• Academic learning

When students lack emotional regulation skills, we see it as:

• Disruptive behavior

• Shutdowns

• Avoidance

• Big reactions to small problems

Social Emotional Learning (SEL) Supports Academic Success

Research-backed social emotional learning (SEL) programs consistently show that students who develop emotional awareness and regulation skills perform better academically, have fewer behavior issues, and build stronger relationships.

One of the most well-known frameworks is Yale’s RULER program, which focuses on helping students:

• Recognize emotions

• Understand emotions

• Label emotions

• Express emotions

• Regulate emotions

My own classroom lessons are inspired by Yale’s RULER approach, using developmentally appropriate activities that help students practice emotional regulation in ways that feel natural, engaging, and realistic. 

SEL Lessons That Don’t Feel Awkward (or Get Eye Rolls)

Let’s be honest:
Students can spot a forced SEL lesson from a mile away.

That’s why my lessons focus on:

• Creative emotional expression through art

• Student-friendly language (not therapy-speak)

• Reflection that feels authentic, not scripted

• Practical strategies students can actually use

By grounding lessons in creativity and choice, students learn emotional regulation skills for kids in a way that feels empowering — not preachy.

Why Teaching Emotional Regulation Benefits Teachers Too

Teaching emotional regulation in the classroom doesn’t just help students — it helps teachers.

When students have the tools to regulate their emotions:

• Classroom management improves

• Transitions go more smoothly

• Conflicts decrease

• Teachers spend less time firefighting and more time teaching

That’s a win for everyone.

Final Thoughts: Emotional Regulation Is a Life Skill

When we teach emotional regulation, we’re not just helping students calm down.

We’re teaching them how to:

• Pause before reacting

• Handle frustration

• Recover from mistakes

• Communicate their needs

• Build empathy and resilience

These are skills students will use long after they leave our classrooms.

So yes — teach reading, writing, and math.
But also teach students how to understand and manage their emotions.

Because emotionally regulated students don’t just learn better — they live better.